El Fin.

CORRECTION to the comeback post: Ok, so I was reminded of those times in college and once while overseas… ok, twice while overseas, and that other time last year… so, I must recant my statement in the last post – I said I was not a whore when, in fact, I am kinda a whore, ok a lot a whore. Whatev, at least I’m a gittin mine.

Now, where were we....
Oh yeah - two weekends ago - I, Tys, and Matt had just left the first house party.

I’m going to skip the boring details of the next two bars and fast-forward past the next 84 or so text messages because all that amounted to was me trying to pick up a couple guys Tys knew, kissing some random chick, stabbing some tipsy fat guy (the ass stepped on my foot and worse, my new shoes), and finally agreeing to go with the boys to some party over in Lincoln Park. I was assured it would be worth it… and Tys promised me drugs.

Unless you count the ‘roids he did in college, Tys is not a drug guy, doesn’t hang in drug circles, and certainly wouldn’t recognize a drug party, so when he promises drugs, I heed caution. Well, holy shit, there were drugs, lots of them. The whole scene was way abnormal, even for me. Have you ever seen that movie with a very farfetched drug scene, the one where everybody’s on something and super chic? Yeah, this was it. I’ve been to a few coke-head parties in my day, but this was indescribable, well nearly indescribable, anyway. There were chicks making out, people pretending not to notice, kids doing lines on the kitchen counter, and us looking as lost as my boyfriend at an Ani Difranco concert.

Tys’s friend’s sister quickly greeted us and to spite being a totally spoiled trust fund kid, she seemed pretty cool but it could’ve been paint talking (yes, this is a drug reference, try to keep up). Like any good host, she asked us if we wanted anything. The boys took a beer and me, well, let’s just say I had a “cocktail” and leave it at that. When I am arrested and on trial for the seventh drug related horse theft incident in more that four months, I wouldn't want you to have to lie for me under oath... and you would becuase you know that I know people, people who know bad people.

After an hour or so, or three for all I know, the fellas were ready to roll out. Naturally, when informed of their intent to leave and take me with them, I went into hysterics and began throwing beer bottles, reminding them that they were not my real Dad and I never liked kissing them that way. Fortunately for them (and everyone else, I'm sure), I was struck by a ricocheting bottle, allowing them just enough leverage to drag my ass out.

Leaving is one thing, actually getting home is another. After I forcibly made them stop at two different Vienna Beef stands for cheese fries, some bar for a sixer of Heineken Light, and three corner shops in search of one pack Orbit Sweet Mint gum, we made it home. Needless to say, I slept on the couch and by “on the couch”, I mean “with Tys’s roommate.”

I know, hardly worth the long wait, but it was only meant to be a next day continuation, not a next week thing, so back off, you vicious ingrates!!

See you soon! Love, Nicole